Friday, July 9, 2010

Friday Mail: Getting the Yeti off your back.

As everyone knows by now, Mark Cavendish finally shed the primate that was riding upon his back by winning Stage 5 of the Tour de France yesterday.  And what a relief this is.  Obviously, Cavs was a little frustrated by the outcome of Stage 4 which prompted this reaction as he returned back to the HTC bus after he lost the sprint to Alessandro Petacchi.

Yes, nothing like a little bike dropping and helmet tossing to help deal with one's frustrations.  But, the Manx Missile has appeared to return to form as he took Stage 5 in commanding fashion which resulted in a few shed tears on the podium.
Such is the emotional roller-coaster that is the Tour.  One minute, you are tossing your equipment around like PeeWee Herman in an adult movie theater, and the next minute you are crying like a baby.  At times like this, I just want to hug Cavs like a giant stuffed Skoda Yeti and tell him it's all going to be OK.....

And with that, I bring you Friday Mail!

Dear PooBah,
I ride on the trail a lot, and some days I'm so happy about the things I experience that it would take a large man to slap the grin off my face.  Just wanted to share....
Bob H.

Which section of the trail do you ride most frequently?  Be specific, please!

Dear PooBah,
I got arrested by a cop on a bicycle last week and when I tried to resist, he cuffed me to his steering tube.  Is this legal?  He busted me for calling him a pig on wheels.  Who knew bike cops were so aggressive?
Cindy T.

As a general rule of thumb, you don't want to underestimate bicycle-mounted police officers.....they are more formidable than what most give them credit for.

Dear PooBah,
I'm so worried about my son.  Lately he's been getting into gangsta' rap and is running around with a bunch of gang-bangers at his school.  Just last week, he bought himself a bike to join the local bicycle gang.  Normally, I would advocate him riding a bicycle and getting out of the house, but I've heard this bicycle gang may be active in terrorizing the neighborhood.  What do I do?
Helen G.

I don't think you need to worry...he doesn't seem to be grasping the gangster concept that well.

Dear PooBah,
I found a sweet frame for sale on line the other day that is supposedly an original Ibis made by Scot Nicol.  It even came with this photo to authenticate it.  I'm pretty sure that is Nicol himself under the mustache and mullett.  But how can I be sure this is the real deal?
Todd A.
Just make sure it also comes with the "handjob" cable hangers!

Dear PooBah,
I'm stationed in Afghanistan right now, but luckily have my mountain bike with me so that I can continue to train.  They guys in my platoon and I have a running bet  of how many Taliban insurgents I could safely jump over if given the opportunity.  How many do you think?
Sgt. Kendall M.

I've put together a virtual image of the scenario you laid out to try to theorize how many you could clear.  Because you didn't specify if the Taliban fighters were armed or not, I chose to arm them (I know this makes your task more difficult, but you don't want to look like a weenie in front of your platoon).  However, to offset this clear handicap, I also chose to give you one authentic cloked E.T. in a front-mounted milk crate which should give you some cosmic lift.  When I ran the numbers, I came up with five Taliban.  Good luck.

Dear PooBah,
I live in DC and actually work at the White House.  I love to commute by bicycle but am having some comfort issues on the 10 mile ride in every day.  I am experiencing some pain in my butt and my toes will occasionally go numb.  Do think this is a fit problem, or maybe an issue with my saddle?  Any help you could provide would be most appreciated!
Lester W.
This is a tough one.  I guess I would start by swapping out those New Balance running shoes for some true cycling shoes.  You might also consider using some chamois cream....the DZ Nuts brand might be most appropriate for you.

That's it for today, kids.....ride safe.


1 comment:

  1. Lester appears to have some serious problems, as does Cindy to a lesser degree.
    In fact, that seems to be the underlaying theme here.... problems that people have.
    Of the list, I feel like I could handle Bob's problem the best.