It was the best of times, it was the worst of times....Oh Hai, Governor!

Apologies are in order for my long absence.  Or, if you read this and hate it (which many of you apparently do), I hope you enjoyed a nice respite.  I wish I could explain my lack of posting because I was training in the Dolomites for the upcoming Mario Cipollini Gran Fondo.  (I've heard rumors that the MC Gran Fondo will be more of a cyclocross event which will actually involve carrying nude women over barriers in the midst of the ride.)

But alas, the real reason I've not been able to write more is because of my day job.  I will spare you the details, but let me try, instead, to depict what I've been going through at work in a more illustrative manner.

At any rate - I wanted to send a heartfelt thanks out to Off Track events and the organizers of the Pedaler's Jamboree.  The COMOCYCO GEEC, dog and I took part in the Jamboree this weekend.  Not ever having attended a jamboree before, I had to look up the definition prior to embarking and was interested to learn that according to Merriam-Webster, a jamboree is "a noisy or unrestrained carouse".  Not knowing what a 'carouse' was, I again had to look up a definition to learn that it is "a drunken revel."  Yes, yes, true enough as we encountered many a drunken reveller starting in Rocheport as one cyclist came into town toting a life-size plastic Spuds McKenzie and a plastic sac full of booze.

Needless to say, good times were had by all, including the approximate 1.2 million mosquitoes that sucked upon us over the course of the two days.  The heat, humidity and voracious appetite of the bugs lead the GEEC and me to wonder if we had taken a wrong turn somewhere and ended up in Borneo.  But alas, a little good phlebotomy never hurt a committed cyclist, and in actuality can help to offset a hematocrit that has mysteriously crept too high.

But as much as I don't want to discuss scandal, I couldn't help but recently be taken aback by what has become the Zapruder film of the pro peloton:  Davide Cassini's video depicting the practice of mechanical bike doping.  Beyond just demonstrating how one can equip a road bike with a motor hidden in the seat tube, the video also implicates Fabian Cancellara's use of the motor in his victories at Paris-Roubaix and the Tour of Flanders.

Yes, in the wake of the Landis-Lance revellations, it appears as though the conspiracy bandwagon has grown large enough for everyone and anyone to jump aboard.....even the super-sized ones...

Entitled "Cankles Go Home" seen at the wonderful

Cycling Inquisition blog.

And speaking of detractors of cycling, for those of you keeping up with our Governor and his recent act of allowing the cancelling of the Tour of Missouri, this is how he justified his decision:

“The real things that turn dollars in tourism are things that stay. We’re excited about the 175th anniversary of Mark Twain, the 150th anniversary of the Pony Express, the 50th anniversary of Silver Dollar City. Those are things that are going to be there, not just passing by at 29 mph and being there 24 seconds.”

Wow...I can practically feel the vibrations of the onslaught of toursists beating down the doors to Missouri's gates to celebrate the 150th anniversary of the Pony Express.

Well since the Governor appears to be such a fan of Mark Twain, I wonder if he's familiar with this quote, "You can't depend on your judgement when your imagination is out of focus."