Superheroes: Refined by hand

Yesterday I wrote about feeling conflicted over enjoying female bicycle "pin-ups" while recognizing the complete absence of substance within such images.  Last night, however, I discovered something that has left my conflicted mind at peace:  a cycling pin-up calendar which actually serves a purpose (other than raising the seat post). 

The TyK (www.thoughtyouknew.us) Project was:

 "....created to address modern day stereotypes of women.  Frustrated with being pegged as either mechanically savvy but asexual, or cute but inept with their bikes, these PinUps showcase the dual nature that women cyclists embody."

The women featured in the calendar are everyday cyclists from Chicago and the proceeds from the sale of the calendars go directly to the Chicago Women's Health Center.  Of equal and obvious importance as helping an important organization, however, is the knowledge that I can, once again, oogle lovely women wearing unrealistic outfits, and striking uncomfortable poses with their bicycles, but now do so entirely guilt free.  Thank you TyK for returning a piece of my soul.

This year, the TyK project has also made a calendar of male cyclists, dressed as superheroes.  If the reasoning behind displaying women as pin-ups is in reaction to frustrations of female cyclists being seen as either "mechanically savvy but asexual or cute but inept" are we to gather that dressing up male cyclists as superheroes is out of frustration that we are perceived either as 'fashionably challenged yet obsessed with depilation or fond of dressing in tights but are slow?'  Of course, those are both obvious truisms where I am concerned...but beyond that, men, in general, also just like to play superheroes.  Even when they are already the fastest men in the world...like Cancellara.

So strong is the affinity between cycling and superheroes, that a Geman-based bicycle manufacturer called Fixie Inc, uses as their slogan "Cycles for Heroes."  Specializing in steel frames, they make road and cyclocross bikes, but exhibit their clear passion in fixed gears, as their name suggests.  And because they are fixie-fixated, one can imagine that their ad campaign features absolutely nothing to do with fixed-gear bikes, but rather tries to capture the enigmatic urban cycling culture.  Take the cover of their 2009 catalogue.

I'm not sure how riding a fixed gear bicycle makes one a hero (or heroine as the case may be), but it has clearly upset this poor women wearing a latex corset with pearl crucifix to the point where she is crying her mascara away.  Related to Fixie Inc. is the following: If you've not yet heard, Bicycling magazine and Colavita are sponsoring a contest to win a trip to Verona, Italy to ride in the 2010 Granfondo Eddy Merckx by describing how you incorporate olive oil into your cycling.  What does this have to do with Fixie Inc?  If you were going to say that the young lady above has to grease up with it before squeezing into that outfit, you would only be partially correct.  The real answer is that Fixie Inc. sells a singlespeed bike called "The Rusty" which comes, pre-rusted.....

...a very labor-intensive process they refer to as "refined by hand" which requires the frame to be regularly sealed with olive oil, extra virgin.  Leaving it outside in the rain for a couple months doesn't hurt either.

The folks at Fixie Inc. are clearly so obsessed with their own awesomeness, that I'm sure once they bust into the olive oil, there is much more than their rusty frames that are being "refined by hand".  But I digress......Instead of merely playing dress up (whether you be a pin-up, a hand-refined rusted bike, or superhero), some truly embody the act of a superhero, like old-school Graeme Obree who invented the 'Superman' posture while competing in the hour record, which was later adopted by Chris Boardman and used in the individual pursuit.

Because the 'Superman' position has now been banned, current competitors must ride the 4km (3km for women) in a more conventional time trial posture, which is exactly what Jack Bobridge did a couple days ago when he posted the second fastest time ever at 4:14:427.  The fastest time was established by Boardman's (4:11:114) at the 1996 World Championships but was completed using the now defunct 'Superman' position.  Could not positioning himself in the 'Superman' really explain the differences in time?  I wonder if oiling up his skinsuit with some extra virgin wouldn't shave a little more off of Bobridge's time...a little hand-refining never hurt....

Pedal on!

Of Pin-ups and Pomegranates

Last night, I happened upon a story about the bike Mark Cavendish used to win several of the sprint stages at last year's Tour.  The folks at Scott bicycles had a special bike painted for Cav called the "Sprint Air Force" complete with WWII era paintjob of a pin-up girl wearing a Union Jack kilt and faux rivets to make it look like an old bomber.

The site of this conjured up a memory that I hadn't thought upon in quite some time.  It involved a rare but inspired moment of vandalism when I was in undergrad.  I was studying in the Biology school's library on a Sunday afternoon and felt a sudden call of nature that only the ingesion of two dozen Pizza Express breadsticks and cheese sauce the night before can bring.  I made a mad dash to the men's room (the remote one on the third floor - not the one closest to the library) thus ensuring sweet solitude and privacy.  I jumped into the last stall and as I was sitting there, I noticed that the plaster on the wall adjacent to the toilet had a smooth, matte finish, and was this brilliant, off-white color - almost like a bleached parchment.  In a moment that was likely to be my closest experience to divine intervention, much like Handel's inspiration to write the Messiah, or Mozart's motivation to pen the Requiem for Mass in D minor, I grabbed a No. 2 Ticonderoga pencil and began to draw a reclining nude woman on the plaster wall.  To this day, I have no idea why at that moment, I had to draw a naked woman, but I did.  However, I tried to draw her in the style of the classic WWII era pin-up girls - just like the one found on Cav's bike.

Never before, nor since, had I partaken in such a blatent act of seemingly quasi-perverse graffiti.  As I admitted this to the COMO CYCO Good Eggette and Editor in Chief (GEEC) last night, I did so initially with tremendous zeal as the memory of drawing my Venus of the Bathroom Stall flooded back, but was quickly overtaken with some trepidation, as I worried what she might think of me.  She asked what became of the drawing.  I told her that I had left it in place and returned to check on it a week later.  What I saw amazed me.  Not only had the custodians left the Venus in place, but there were a string of comments written below....Most were positive and encouraging.  The GEEC then said quite non-chalantly, "It was your first blog."  And indeed, perhaps it was.  I had offered something up that I found interesting rather anonymously for the approval or disapproval of the masses - and then watched the response.  This is, after all, the point of blogging - isn't it?  Well, that and getting free shit....

Speaking of which, several weeks ago, I received an email from Ryan at POM Wonderful, makers of all things pomegranate, asking if I would be interested in trying some pomegranate juice since I had provided some recent commentary on the Garmin-Transition Team for which POM Wonderful is now a sponsor.  I said absolutely and a couple weeks later, on my doorstep arrived a case of 100% Pomegranate juice to try.

Aside from my in-depth knowledge of cheese, I am in no way, shape or form, a food or beverage critic.  Neither am I a nutrionist.  And prior to the white box labelled Mr. PooBah showing up on my doorstep, the grand total of my experience with pomegranates had consisted of my high school French teacher bringing one to class as a demonstration of French fruit. It was during that same class that Pat Todaro stole it from Madame Moser's desk before we could eat it and threw it at Mark Hendershot's head.  So other than the flight dynamics and bursting strength of pomegranates, I know precious little.  As such, any comments I make about POM wonderful should be taken with a grain of salt the size of, well, a pomegranate.  When I opened the box, the first thing I encountered was a note from Ryan detailing all of the wonderful attributes regarding this misunderstood fruit.  I will not go into excruciating detail here, except to mention one of the most interesting things I learned from the data sheet.  Did you know that "Many scholars now suggest that it was the pomegranate, not an apple, depicted in the biblical Garden of Eden?" 

So here in my hand was the juice of the forbidden fruit of biblical proportions that was experienced first in the Garden of Eden?  Having never tasted a pomegranate, I decided the only way to enjoy this loss of fruit virginity appropriately would be to do a biblical re-enactment.  Thus, I stripped down completely naked in my kitchen and after girding my loins with a lettuce leaf, I shotgunned an entire bottle, and then shouted "Damn you, EVE!"  I then read the label which said that it was supposed to be refrigerated and shaken prior to drinking.  Still....pretty damned tasty.  Oddly enough, I did actually then start to feel a sense of shame at my nakedness....but that might have just been because my dog was staring at me.

And not to flog a flaccid penis, but look what else I discovered:

This article, published in the International Journal of Impotence Research (2007) by Forest et al documents that although statistical significance wasn't quite acheived, there was a general trend for men who suffered with mild to moderate erectile dysfunction to have improved marks on some erectile functional scoring systems after drinking pomegranate juice for 4 weeks versus a placebo.  These effects are attributed to the antioxidants contained within which rival and may even surpass the quantity found in red wine.  These same antioxidants have a host of other potentially positive physiologic effects on the cardiovascular system. While reading this paper, I came across a note made regarding adverse events experienced by those study participants:

"The following adverse events were reported while on POM: diarrhea, flatulence, hyperlipidemia, nasal congesion and hypertesion.  One patient reported anxiety while on placebo."

Well I can say with all honesty that other than my naked shame, I experienced no adverse events in the form of diarrhea, hyperlipidemia, nasal congestion or hypertension....and the flatulence may have been entirely attributable to the burrito I had for lunch.  Good stuff, that POM!  Thanks again Ryan - and good luck with the Garmin-Transition partnership.

Pedal on!