The right thing: Just do it.

By now, everyone has heard of the continuing fallout of the Lance Armstrong scenario.  Anymore - reading the cycling news is like watching a flock of vultures picking over a carcass.  And I continue to be guilty of said scavenging as well.  To that end, I remind you of the Nike commercial featuring Lance from 2001:



Fast forward to today and the statement that Nike issued  on their website:

"Due to the seemingly insurmountable evidence that Lance Armstrong participated in doping and misled Nike for more than a decade, it is with great sadness that we have terminated our contract with him.  Nike does not condone the use of illegal performance enhancing drugs in any manner.  Nike plans to continue support of the Livestrong initiatives created to unite, inspire and empower people affected by cancer."

 

I wonder what they want in return.  A medal? Are they suddenly expecting us to think they actually have integrity?  Let's remember that Nike signed football star Michael Vick after he had been arrested and found guilty of running a dog fighting ring....the first time in the history of sports marketing that a company dropped an athlete from their brand and then signed them back. 

 

As I was listening to the presidential debate last night, one question posed to the candidates was "How can we keep American companies from sending jobs overseas."  One answer I was looking for was not uttered by either candidate - and in reality, probably doesn't exist:  Convince highly successful American companies that NOT outsourcing their manufacturing to China, Indonesia and Vietnam (I'm talking to you Nike), where the law prohibits workers from forming independent trade unions and protective labor laws are unenforced, is actually patriotic - it's the right thing to do.  Convince them that even though this will reduce their profit margin, they will still be able to grow rich and would simultaneously put Americans to work - it's the right thing to do.  When was doing the right thing ever synonymous with doing the easiest thing?  Doing the right thing is hard......kind of like not doping.  I say this at the risk of sound ridiculously naive, I realize.  But how much money does Phil Knight really need, anyway?  So much that he endorses a torturer of animals? So much that he condones Indonesian child sweat shops? So much that he indirectly bankrolled the largest, most systematic doping program in the history of sport?

 

I guess it should not be surprising, therefore, that one of Nike's recent ad campaigns for a soccer jersey for the Sport Club International was delivered in some very unique and crazy expensive packaging:

"COLORADO BLOOD:  When a team enters the pitch, every fan wants the players to give their blood, sweat and tears for the club.  That's what inspired Nike for the launching of the new jersey of Sport Club Internacional. Known as Colorado (the red team), the red of its famous jersey was presented inside a blood bag."

 

Opening the box reveals an IV bad surrounded by plastic 'ice cubes'.

 

And within the IV bag is a red jersey, with Nike swoosh.

 

"MANIFESTO:  If there is one thing that identifies us, it is blood. Blood is what makes our hearts beat.  It is what keeps us alive.  Blood carries our history.  Every win, every tear, every trophy is there.  And trophies abound for those who have won everything....."

 

Indeed, "blood does identify us...." just ask Jan Ulrich, Ivan Basso, Frank Schleck and every other Operacion Puerto cyclist.

 

All Nike proved by dropping their endorsement for Lance was that they were the first rat to jump from the deck of the sinking ship.  Soon after they bailed - RadioShack followed.  Interestingly, at the time of this writing, the Lance Armstrong website still listed them both as sponsors.  Well if anyone is interested in playing a little doping bingo - I've attached a board below for you to play along....Any guesses as to which company is next?

 

Nike's abandonment not only opens the door for other sponsors to follow suit, but it nearly commands it if the others want to feign 'integrity' as well.***

 

Here's the kicker in my household....The GEEC loves Nike shit....she just ran the Chicago marathon in a great Nike running shirt.  I know she must grow tired (as I'm sure many of you have) of me bitching and moaning about all the facets that emerge surrounding this issue on a daily basis, so when she heard me complaining about Nike the other evening, she really looked weary and asked, "Is Nike on the shit-list too?"

 

I told her it's probably best to ignore me for a while...

 

*** Addendum:  Well, today ended up being a little like dominoes in the world of LA sponsorship abandonment.  In case anyone needs a refresher to their board, you can check out the COMO CYCO Tumblr site - or look below.  Hope everyone had fun playing!  There are still three open spaces....(We're looking at you Oakley, SRAM and Johnson!)

 

 

 

Timing is everything: Ass-kissing 101.

Timing is everything, as they say.

Which leads me to this June 7th announcement I just read:

U.S. Postal Service's Bicycling Stamps Promote Healthy Lifestyle

"Excuse me, garçon?  Could I please have an extra helping of bad timing to go with my irony and lentil soup?  Thank you."

Just remember to NOT lick the backs of the stamps within 14 days of any kind of competition that requires you to pee in a cup.

Speaking of the ramifications of having hot piss, we recently witnessed with the Alberto Contador case that if one loses the winner's Maillot Jaune due to doping infractions, the jersey is passed down to whomever is next on the podium - in that case Andy Schleck.  So this got me thinking - who actually will be awarded the wins for the Tour de France from 1999-2005 if Armstrong loses those jerseys as a result of the USADA investigation?  It's not as easy as just picking 2nd place - because most of those guys have subsequently been found to be loaded to the gills as well.  I went in search of an answer for this and the best source I could find was an article written by Bill Strickland in 2010.  For his analysis, Mr. Strickland was also curious what the podium would look like if all convicted dopers are removed for each of those years. Riders were not eliminated if there were only rumors or suspicion.  Thus, he excluded Lance Armstrong from the list in his article.  I will play devil's advocate and take it one step further to examine who would be awarded the maillot jaune if Armstrong is found to be guilty and have included any cyclist who has been convicted of doping since.  Interesting to note is just how far down the list you have to go in some years to get to someone who has not been found guilty by some governing body.  Here we go!

1999:  New winner: Fernando Escartin (formerly 3rd place)

2000:  New winner: Fernando Escartin (formerly 9th place)

2001: New winner: Andrei Kivilev (formerly 4th place)

(died as a result of a crash in the 2003 Paris-Nice race)

2002: New winner: Jose Azevedo (formerly 6th place)

2003: New winner: Haimar Zubeldia (formerly 5th place)

2004: New winner: Andrea Kloden (formerly 2nd place)

2005: New winner: Cadel Evans (formerly 8th place)

Yeah - you're probably thinking what I'm thinking.  If we allow suspicion to creep in, then several of these guys don't exactly look squeaky clean either - especially those that later went on to race for the Hog. 

And in the "Ass Kissing Will Get You Everywhere" department comes this chain of events:  One week ago Team RadioShack's director Johan Bruneel emphatically says Chris Horner is not racing in the Tour de France because he didn't race in the Tour de Suisse.  Period.  But doesn't have the decency to tell him this personally, and Chris has to learn about it when his wife reads it on the web.  Horner responds with a bit of understandable anger initially, but then yesterday issues this statement on Cyclingnews:

Chris Horner: I don't believe Armstrong cheated

And miracle beyond miracles, look what happens less than 12 hours later as reported by Bicycling.

Team boss Bruyneel is 'rethinking' RadioShack squad for Tour de France.

"I was talking with Johan yesterday about the Tour," Horner told Bicycling on Friday.  "We had some lost communication between us before the 14-man selection was made.  He said he will rethink the team for the Tour now with me in the mix.  So there is still a chance of me going.  Johan and I had a great talk so I'm hoping it all works out."

I don't know whose pandering is worse....Horner's to the Bruyneel-Armstrong machine, or Bruyneel to the American public by now considering a popular American for the last spot on the team two days after the USADA shit hits the fan.  It's pretty convenient for Johan that Andy broke his ass when he did so that he could play the Horner card to save a little face with some American skeptics in the wake of the systematic doping allegations.  Timing is everything.  And I thought for sure Chris was going to respond to Bruyneel with answer 'd'. 

Only time for a few of letters today:

---

Dear PooBah,

Shakespeare's Pizza (Best College Hangout in the nation as declared by Good Morning America) wants to revitalize it's pedicab service and is looking for pilots!  Can you tell any interested parties about it?  Thanks!

Bob

Will do.  Anyone interested can drop me an email and I will forward the phone number you need to call to get hooked up!

---

Dear PooBah,

I heard that a weekly cyclocross series is in the works for Columbia this coming fall, suitable for experts and beginners alike.  This sounds amazing!  I want to participate, but have never raced cross before and know how competitive the cycling atmosphere here in COMO is, so I'm a little nervous.  Any advice as to the equipment I should have?

Thanks!

Jerry G.

Jerry-

Just remember - it has nothing to do with your bike, and everything to do with your kit.  As a newb, I'd think about sporting one of these for your first season:

The Medieval Hoodie!

It's even made out of cotton so that you can sweat your balls off and lose that extra few pounds you've been toting around all summer.

---

Dear PooBah,

The shocks on my fork are squeaking something horribly!  I took a picture of them which I'm attaching to this email.  I wonder if you could take a peak and tell me what the problem might be?

Thank you so much -

Heather F.

Heather,

For the life of me I cannot see the bike in the photograph you enclosed.  I think I better see it in person.

---

True Grit! Grandma broke her coccyx!

And by 'Grandma', I actually mean Andy Shleck, and by 'coccyx', I actually mean his sacrum.  He busted it up in a crash during the time trial at the Criterium du Dauphine, which he later had to abandon.  Much like brother Frank's separated shoulder in the Giro d'Italia, director Johnan Bruyneel said it was nothing more than a flesh wound and should not prevent him from racing.  Oops.  Either way, news today is that he's out of the Tour de France, and The Hog (Johan Bruyneel) is left one man shy of a full roster for his catastrophically plummeting RadioSchlep team.  Interestingly enough - he's got someone waiting in the wings that he recently snubbed by intentionally NOT inviting to join the squad going to the Tour de France:

Chris Horner

Interestingly, Bruyneel reportedly never even called the veteran cyclist (who has finished as high as 9th place at the Tour in 2010) to tell him he would not be going to the Tour this year.

"Horner said he learned about his exclusion from the RadioShack Tour team from his wife, who read it on the Internet and called him while he was out training.  He added that as of Monday evening, he had not yet spoken with anyone from RadioShack team management.  The last time he spoke with team manager Johan Bruyneel, Horner said, was a month ealier in Santa Rosa, California, when Bruyneel briefly visited the team prior to the start of the Amgen Tour."

Of course, who are we to doubt the management practices of such a master tactician, like The Hog.  I  mean, after all - he wrote a book and everything!  He MUST know what he's doing - right?

So, by my calculations, Team RadioSchlep's tour roster is one man short, and the month of July looks pretty open in Chris Horner's planner.  So, one has to wonder if Hoggy is going to give Chris a ringy-dingy in Bend, Oregon and say something like...."So, Chris.....you busy next month?" 

Let's have a pop quiz and try to guess how Chris will respond.

a. Go Schleck yourself
b. Put your request in writing on the interwebs, and my wife will read it to me
c. Only if you can start lacing my autotransfusions with some fucking Rogaine
d. Did you really marry an ex-stripper?  DAYUMMMM!

To add insult to injury, in addition to his injured sacrum, it appears as though Andy also has a horrible anus.  This is the second Team RadioSchlep member to be diagnosed with a horrible anus in less than a week!

The Hog has been frustrated with his team all year, to be honest.  They just seem to be lacking grit......bravado.....guts.....chutzpah!  In a word, they are lacking what I call the LTDF.....or the Laurens Ten Dam Factor.  You remember the Rabobank cyclist from last year's tour - right?

The dude that smeared his nose off on the pavement of some God-forsaken French road, got wrapped up by a hack Mavic mechanic posing as a medic with gauze that looked like it once shrouded Boris Karloff, but still finished the race?  This is what the Hog is looking for!  His own Chris Horner did not show at either the US National Championships or the Tour de Suisse because of a supposed "back injury" - and it was this last race omission that finally pissed off The Hog enough to kick him off the Tour squad.  Meanwhile, Ten Dam IS racing in the Tour de Suisse and literally puked himself all the way up the Verbier the other night (which I took pictures of on my TV!)

Even his 'O-face' is a god-damned grimace!

(I had to crop out the rest of this photo to keep this post rated PG....but can tell you that those Rabobank soigneurs really know how to give a rub down...)

And speaking of true grit in the Tour de Suisse, comes this story from the Dutch sports page of the Nieuwsblad.be site of a Swiss land owner who refuses to take shit off of anybody....literally.

Boer lubricates Lotto team car full of excrement.

The translated story follows...you just have to read it yourself:

Nothing like drinking a couple cups of coffee chased with a RedBull moments before your race starts, and having to pinch one off - but finding your team bus toilets backed up....so being forced to doing your "big message" in a nearby forest, having the land owner catch you, then "make himself evil", by "recognizing your sweater," and then "smearing the team car loaded with your gevoeg."

Now THAT - is a horrible anus....

Better living through chemistry

By now, I'm sure everyone has heard the story that former US cyclist and drug runner, Joe Papp has admitted to supplying French racer Jeannie Longo's coach and husband, Yolande Ciprelli with EPO for her use.  Of course, Ciprelli is following the playbook response in appropriate stepwise manner:
1) Declare outrage.
2) Deny everything.
3) Lawyer up.
4) Sue the accusers for defamation of character (forthcoming). 

For those of you who don't know, Jeannie Longo-Ciprelli has an amazing 59 national titles and 13 world titles to her credit and was slated to be selected for the French national team to compete in the upcoming World championships.  Blah, blah, blah - we've heard this all before.  What really struck me about this story was what Papp wrote in one of the newly released emails from him to Ciprelli sealing the deal in 2007 regarding the sale of the EPO.

"We ask that you send us the 500 euros on Monday, with your shipping information.  We then ship to you the 80,000 iu (international units) and we call it "even" because we want you to be happy and satisfied with your transaction from us.  We are closing all specials Monday 23 April, so we want for you to be able to take advantage of the good pricing since you have been in contact with us for some time."

What the shit is this?  Was Papp honestly running special sales on the Poe?  "Buy now for 25% off and get your pre-mixed sterile viles for free.  Only good through Monday, so hurry!"

And in othe recent breaking news, apparently inspired by the RadioShack-Leopard merger, now Astana and SaxoBank are "talking to each other" according to the Dutch newspaper DeTelegraaf. 

And why shouldn't the RadioShack-Leopard merger serve as inspiration?  It worked for Garmin-Cervelo, right?  Sports writer Bonnie Ford with ESPN has an interesting article on the subject  here.  I've taken the liberty to lift some of the more memorable quotes from her piece:

Brian Nygaard, the Leopard general manager Bruyneel will replace, declined comment. Through a team spokesman, Becca also declined to be interviewed. Stapleton said he took no offense at Becca's reported comments in a Luxembourg television interview that "nothing about this team will be American except the sponsors.''  Why would RadioShack, a company that doesn't do business in western Europe, cede control to an organization based there? "This is not a precursor to expanding" into that part of the world, Applbaum [RadioShack chief marketing officer] clarified.

Applbaum said he and RadioShack are comfortable with their commitment. He expressed regret that some riders and staff will lose their jobs, but said he is confident Bruyneel will make the transition smooth. "He has an incredible track record in Grand Tours. … He's a phenomenal manager of people," Applbaum said. "Integrity is a core pillar of our brand, and at this juncture, we continue to monitor the [Armstrong] situation. If the investigation changes course, we'll address it at that time."

Cervelo co-founder Gerard Vroomen said the constantly shifting alliances in cycling have immunized him from being surprised at anything, and he pointed out that the Schlecks were reportedly first courted by Bruyneel a couple of years ago when RadioShack was being formed. Vroomen speculated that Becca became impatient both with the search for a title sponsor and the team's results. "I can't climb into his head, but 12 months ago he was probably sure he was going to win the Tour de France and the spring classics, and he didn't do either,'' Vroomen said. "Someone must have made the suggestion that Bruyneel creates Tour de France winners.''

Yes indeed, Bruyneel does know how to "create" a Tour de France winner. 

T-shirt now comes in maillot-jaune yellow!

Here's what I find puzzling.  Becca wants that "nothing about the team will be American," (aside from the money apparently) and this in spite the fact that the current US National champion Mathew Busche, in addition to former champion Ben King as well as Chris Horner will be racing for them.  Further, according to Ford, "Capital Sports and Entertainment, the Austin-based company that held RadioShack's license through a subsidiary, will....become a subcontractor, handling marketing and sponsor hospitality. Trek (an American company) was already supplying bikes to both teams" and will continue to do so.  And   "RadioShack will continue its affiliation with its most famous former rider, keeping Lance Armstrong under a personal services and endorsement contract, according to his agent, CS&E founder and partner Bill Stapleton." 

For your consideration:

#1) Team bikes: American.  Team money: American.  Team riders:  American champions.  Team owner: "Nothing...will be American."  I may not know my ass from apple-butter - but something tells me the right hand doesn't know who the left hand is jerking off.

#2) Anyone else think the Hog is looking forward to getting out of the States...like yesterday?

#3) Why would the ever-patriotic Armstrong be OK with supporting a team in which "nothing...will be American."

#4) Truly - what is in this deal for RadioShack which has no presence in Europe, where operations will be based, and the majority of the team's racing presence will be felt?

This post is brough to you by the letter 'M' which stands for Multitasking and Merging

As i was snagging YouTube videos for yesterday's post, I noticed several topic-related advertisements along the side bar on YouTube's page.  This one caught my eye.

Honestly, I have no idea what kind of a company "Soujourn" is, but I'm guessing they are in the business of swinging cycling vacations somewhere in North America as couple #1 (on the left) are wearing Colorado-esque jerseys and couple #2 (on the right) are wearing Canada-esque jerseys.....and are also dry-humping doggy-style while photographing couple #1 in some Tuscan villa.  Lessons learned from this?  Canadians multi-task better than Americans, or after those long, dark Canadian winters, any self-respecting Canuck gets irrepressibly horny if you place them in a Mediterranean setting.

And speaking of multitasking, a reader sent me a couple of photos of how our local COMO bike racks are also having to do some multitasking as of late.

Exhibit A.

Exhibit B.

In theory, I have no problem with the skateboard being chained to the bikerack.  However that's because I'm old, and envisioning skaters from the Dogtown and Z-boys era:

Peggy Oki - the only female member of the original Zephyr team.  She could have chained her skateboard to my bikerack any day.

Instead - I'm pretty sure most of the individuals carrying skateboards on campus today are a little more like this:

Nothing more than an advertisement for something choaderific.  He probably just swapped his fixie out for the board - which he bought used off of Craigslist to make sure it has that well-worn look.

However, using a bike rack as a sign post for a no-trespassing sign is perfection in the art of mixed messages.  That said, I would be willing to bet that not a single bicycle had been parked at this particular bike rack seen on Cherry Street for a long-ass time, thus prompting the owners of the adjacent establishment to use it for another purpose.  This isn't justification - it's just an observation that most COMO citizens would still prefer to drive to get their soy double mocha frappucinos rather than ride or walk there.

And speaking of mixed signals, Brian Nygaard, former General Manager of Trek Leopard is stepping down from his position with the team as it whores itself out merges with RadioShack.  The name of the new team is RadioShack-Nissan-Trek.  And whoops - looks like mastermind Falvio Becca forgot to tell his current Leopard sponsor, Mercedes Benz, that the whoring out merger was occuring with a company that already has financial backing from an auto company: Nissan.

Looks like Andy is going to have the keys to the Benz back....

But seriously, the name 'RadioShack-Nissan-Trek' is just God-awful.  How can Bruyneel expect the lithe European boys from Leopard (pronounced lay-O-pard) to ride for a team with such a cumbersome and un-feline name?  Certainly we can help them come up with something better.  I've read it numerous places and clearly am pilfering it from someone, by with the increasing age of some of the cyclists likely to be retained after the whoring merger (ie Horner), the name Cougar-Shack seems to be pretty appropriate. 

With all of this change, the Hog has got to be feeling a little stressed, so let's lend him a hand.  If you send me your idea of a new better team name, I will compile the entire list and hand-write them on the back of a card that he might find helpful in his near future.

And speaking of.....

Like many of you perhaps, I spent a portion of this past weekend watching the SuperBowl.  This was actually the first professional football game I saw all year, and by all accounts, I guess I picked a pretty good one to watch.  There is nothing like seeing well-toned athletes perform in the peak of physical fitness.

("I can shit thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis big!")

As I watched the game, I wondered if the NFL battles with doping athletes as much as cycling these days.  But then it occured to me that their plates are probabaly already too full with issues of animal cruelty, sexual assault and nightclub shootings for them to worry about silly things like someone rubbing a little testosterone cream on their ass. 

And speaking of creamy asses, we of course know that doping can be a lot more involved.  Take Ricardo Ricco.  Yep, the self-proclaimed "Cobra" of the peloton, who was busted for doping a couple of years ago and recently made a comeback declaring his newly cleansed state, was reportedly rushed to a hospital in Italy on Sunday in shock after having transfused some of his own blood that he had kept in his fridge for 25 days.  Apprently he feared that the blood was not still healthy.

("The Cobra" is actually dumber than he looks)

Twenty-five days?  If you wouldn't even drink milk that old, I'm guessing injecting blood that was just hanging out in the fridge next to the pickles and mayonaise for that long would probably also be a bad idea.

And speaking of bad ideas, who came up with the new jersey for Team Geox-TMC?

Team Footon has replaced the giant black foot with a giant black shoe which is apparently able to fart from the sole.  I guess you could consider this forward progress?  This is a new frontier for cycling team sponsorship, as the Geox company has elected to depict an actual photograph of their product on the jersey rather than a simple company logo.  Imagine if all the pro teams did this.  Take for example Team RadioShack, who is named for the retail store that has been mass-producing electronics nerds since 1977:

(This is one Pro-jersey that I would actually buy)

And speaking of not-so-hot ideas....I have to say that the podium girls at the Tour of Qatar really leave a lot to be desired...

Wiggin' Out: Sex (Pistols), Lies and Twitter

I have been watching the road-racing pro-tour news with much interest over the past several days as some major shake-ups have recently occured and still seem to be evolving.  Most of these changes surround Bradley Wiggins, who finished in 4th place at this year's Tour de France.

Wiggo is an interesting character who got his first start in professional road racing on a team meant to promote vegetarianism and Linda McCartney brand Foods.  Hence the name, the Linda McCartney Racing Team whose jerseys were apparently inspired by boxes of Kraft Macaroni & Cheese.

Unfortunately, this project went belly-up after about a year with massive financial losses.  Wiggins then went on to race for a number of French squads before ending up last year with Garmin-Slipstream, where he truly established himself as general classifications contender.  After his break-out performance at this year's Tour, he has been a marked man, with a number of teams attempting to lure him out of the remaining year on his Garmin contract.

Amidst the swirling rumors of his early departure for the newly formed British Sky Team, Wiggo has still found the time to do a little trash talking, or so Cyclingnews.com would have us believe:

In an article published Monday, CyclingNews reported that Wiggins was "talking tough" regarding the 2010 Tour de France and quoted him as saying,

"I've looked at some of the Tour stages.  A lot of people think it won't be a great Tour for me but that first week if anything is advantageous to me....those cobbled stages could have big gaps to the guys like Andy, Contador and the guy from America."

Later on in the article, he had a few additional words regarding "the guy from America",

"It will make for an interesting race and I still think I'm a better ride than Lance and a few of the other guys."

Almost immediately after CyclingNews released this story, the Twitter lines started to buzz from the Wiggo camp in the UK.

Apparently Wiggo didn't think a Tweeted disclaimer was quite good enough to appease the awakened giant, thus prompting an email to il padrino of the peloton himself to which LA responded, publicly no less, on Twitter, just to let everyone know that Wiggo had come begging for his forgiveness.

What would possess Wiggo to make such brash comments?  Who knows for sure, but if we backtrack Wiggo's tweets, we can see what music he was listning to shortly prior to when the poop hit the fan.

Public Image Limited, or PiL, was the experimental punk brainchild of Jon Lydon after the Sex Pistol's demise in 1978.  This could certainly explain Wiggo's seemingly anarcharistic actions.  He got ramped up on a little classic punk and went all Johnny Rotten on us.

It then occured to me that Wiggo and Rotten bear a remarkable resemblence to one another and the source of Wiggins' inspiration now seems all the more clear.

Despite LA's reported forgiveness of Wiggo's brashness, Bradley still may have been scared to the point of performing a childish act in his pants, however, because not long after the incident, he reported on Twitter that he needed some new underwear.

Or perhaps this was code for something else, since he remarked that he was actually changing to a different brand of underwear all together, and that he didn't want regrets 20 years down the line.  Sure enough, CyclingNews is reporting this morning that Wiggins has switched teams and will be joining the British squad Team Sky next year.

New underpants indeed.

Back at Team RadioShack headquarters, LA was demonstrating the change in the appearance of their underoos as well.

Not quite what I would consider epic, but apparently The Shack is all about brand recognition, evidenced by the integration of the logo graphics into the paintjob on the team's new Trek Madone 6-series and even onto the Bontrager Wheels.

I wonder if Wiggo will try to integrate a little Johnny onto his new Pinarello?

Pedal on!